Puerto Princesa

Monday, May 9

I woke up thinking I had drunk too much cheap beer the previous night before realizing I’d had 0 alcohol and was instead feeling the beginnings of a cold. After stomach illness, bad sunburn, and now a cold, I was beginning to think I’d never feel fully well again whilst in the Philippines.

We had breakfast and checked out at 9am. Nine hours of travel: trike, ferry, trike, plane, transfer, plane, taxi, and we made it to our hotel, Puerto Pension, in Puerto Princesa. Let the record show, Manila airport is horridly organized and a two hour lay over was almost not enough time to transfer for a domestic flight. Our first plane was slightly delayed to take off and the Manila domestic transfer requires leaving the airport and coming back in again, through security. But we made it.

Just as the sun was setting we walked down to the nearby waterfront park, called Baywalk Waterfront Park. On the walkway several joggers went huffing by as families strolled along holding onto to their little ones or chasing after them as they took off on plastic trikes.

We spotted an open air restaurant and grabbed a table. Around us large families were using their hands to pick up pinchful sizes of sticky rice and seafood bits off of a large banana leaf that covered the table. We ordered the seafood platter for two that came with some tasty cucumber lime juice. They served us a pile of rice covered in a mixture of crab, shrimp, mussels, calamari, bits of grouper, and veggies. The whole thing had been doused in a sauce that reminded us of movie theater popcorn butter. After picking out every last bit of meat from every shell we licked our fingers clean and walked back up the hill to our hotel.

We’d read in the news about violence over the elections in other parts of the Philippines, but our day had gone smoothly as any other and the night in Puerto Princesa was quiet and peaceful.

Tuesday, May 10 – Underground River

Our driver showed up two minutes early, at 6:58am as we hussled downstairs to meet the van. Already inside was another couple, from Montreal. They were of Vietnamese descent so they spoke French (beautifully), English, and Vietnamese. We later learned that they are foodies and have their own YouTube channel where they post videos of themselves eating Asian food from restaurants in Montreal (and an upcoming episode on the Philippines!)

We drove over to another hotel to pick up a family of three: Mom, Dad, and their incredibly cute 5-year old daughter, Martha. They were Filipino but living in New York City (Queens!) and were visiting the mom’s family and her ancestral town.

We also had a driver (named RV? RB?) and a guide named Jed. As every guide does Jed apologized for his lack of English as he fluently described the plan for the day and spoke a little bit about Puerto Princesa’s Underground River.

Voted as one of the seven natural wonders of the world, the Underground River is 7km long and drains into the ocean. Only 4km of the river is navigable but it has been a tourist draw since they created a national park in 1971. Given its accessibility and biodiversity (in it they found 12 new cave minerals and a rare fossil of a manatee ancestor) it is the main tourist draw for the Puerto Princesa area.

The driver put on a video that played on a small screen just below his rear view mirror. Someone had put together a reggae style promo song and accompanying music video for Puerto Princesa that we watched and would have stuck in our heads for the rest of the day.

As we drove by it, Jed pointed out a Vietnamese village where refugees ‘had been put’ following the Vietnam war. Jed said they had been treated kindly and taken care of but that his English vocabulary made it sound like the refugees were corralled there. Our Canadian friends said they understood and we all nodded in agreement that the treatment of refugees is a more complex subject than can be conveyed through a second language.

We had a two hour drive on windy, bumpy roads. Any attempt to close our eyes and rest would be abruptly disrupted by a sudden toss of your head as the van jerked around a corner. When we got to Sabang, a town on the west coast of Palawan and the jumping off point for the river, my head was spinning and – if someone had looked they would have seen- my eyes had cartoon swirls in them.

Jed went to acquire the environmental permits for us as we got out and looked dazed at our surroundings. I opted for an avocado and mango shake, praying that any ice used in it would be filtered. We talked with Martha who showed us her newly purchased dream catcher necklace and asked if we were scared of bats. Her dad had told her there would be a lot of bats in the cave and her brave little mind was still trying to figure out how she felt about this. After not too long we were directed to board a small boat that would take us into the national park.

By this point of our trip in the Philippines we’ve been on dozens of variations of the traditional Filipino boat. They all have had long, bamboo skiffs on either side, usually painted white, that help to keep the boat right side up. This one had a tiny canopy stretched over the top that we had to duck under as the 7 of us sat on two benches facing each other. The sound of the motor blared in our ears as we pushed off (literally, they push off with a giant bamboo pole) and head out into the bay.

It felt like we were going extremely slow but I figured that was the style of this teeny boat. As I was contemplating whether an amateur rowing team would be faster, two other boats came roaring by and passed us, leaving us to navigate their wake. Finally we motored up to the beach and jumped out into the water to walk up to the beach.

We were outfitted with life jackets and helmets and given a few photo opportunities before walking through the jungle to the river. Monkeys had gathered to welcome us as we stepped onto the trail but Jed didn’t like the way they were bearing their teeth, especially as they got close to little Martha, so he shooed them away.

They piled us into a row boat and gave us each an audio guide with one earbud. To minimize the impacts of tourism they opted to have everyone listen to audio guides while the human guide sat in the back and rowed us silently through the cave. We pushed off and the audio started immediately.

Of course, our human guide started speaking, kindly welcoming us to the tour and giving, more or less, exactly the same safety instructions as the audio guide. Seated in the back closest to the driver, I was flustered trying to focus attention on audio guide, human guide, and being in a tiny boat as we approached a huge cave. I paused the audio guide to listen to the human guide and then found myself 30 seconds behind in the tour. As we approached cave formations I would study them, wondering what I was being shown and then hear the explanation 10 seconds later.

As we paddled into the cave entrance the sunlight faded away and we became immersed in the darkness. All around our heads bats chittered and fluttered by, sometimes passing close enough that you could feel the air stir around you. The thick, massive stalactites hung low, tempting us to reach up and touch one. Jed had warned us to be careful to keep our mouths closed while looking up. If cave water should drip onto you, they called it a holy blessing. But if bat guano dripped down, they call that ‘holy shit’.

The tour took us 1.5km upstream to a huge cavern they called the cathedral (real original) where we turned around. The guide shined his light on different cave formations as the audio guide explained (10 seconds later) that we were looking at an angel, a nativity scene, and the last supper. The Philippines were really playing the catholic card hard when they looked at all these stalagmites. Eventually we were also shown the produce section where they pointed out garlic, a mushroom, a corncob and a Japanese eggplant. There was also a formation that looked like a butt which they affectionately named Sharon Stone.

Eventually we looped around and paddled back out into the sunshine. As we walked back to the ocean to catch a boat back down we came across a family of monkeys hanging out right behind the sign that explained what kind of monkeys they are. The baby monkeys were cute, but still untrustworthy.

Then we almost ran into a huge monitor lizard as it crossed the path ahead of us. I asked Jed if he had arranged the animals for us to see and he admitted he had texted them while we’d been in the cave.

We got the slow boat back to Sabang and were directed to an open air restaurant for a Buffett lunch. The food here was actually really delicious. We heaped rice onto our plate and topped it with chicken adobo, some other meaty stew, garlicky vegetables, and some amazing eggplant.

The sauce on the eggplant was vinegary and sweet and I couldn’t get enough of it. There was also noodles, fried lumpia, and some sort of seaweed dish that I passed over but Carl got. He let me taste some and we both agreed it was like eating sea carrots right out of the ocean. Salty! For desert we had fried plantains, watermelon, and juicy pineapple.

We felt stuffed and ready to try and nap in the van when Jed reminded us we had signed up for ziplining. We got in the van and crept down a rutted dirt road into the forest. Jed pointed up the hill and said it would be a 20 minute walk to the top of the zipline.

Jed picked up Martha into his arms and led the way, wading through waist deep waters of a tidal spit in order to get to the beach on the other side. We left the Canadian couple on the beach but the family decided they wanted to try the zipline as well. Jed tried to carry Martha up the hill but she wanted to hike the steep path and ladders on her own. She also scolded him for calling her ‘baby’ saying ‘don’t call me that!’

Martha led the way while her parents huffed and puffed behind us and eventually we made it to the top of the hill and found the wooden platform. They pulled harnesses onto us and slapped helmets on our heads and let us take a few photos before saying ‘ok let’s go’.

No instructions were given, whatsoever. Luckily, we had gone ziplining in Catalina islands for Carl’s birthday and the over abundance of caution and instructions remained in our heads. Most importantly the instruction to not touch the cable which Carl and I were both tempted to do as we immediately were turned around backwards as we flew down the line.

Carl went first and he descended so slowly that I thought for sure he was stuck halfway, over the water, and they were going to send me down to push him along. When it was my turn and he clipped me in I noticed the caribeaners were totally rusted and the locking mechanism that is supposed to screw on was completely loose. I was given no time to question this set up as the guy said ‘sit down’ and pushed me off the ledge for my slow descent down.

Although it wasn’t a fast descent, it was a beautiful one, as my legs dangled over the crystal clear, aquamarine waters just a couple feet below me. We watched as the brave Martha and her enabling family came down the zipline and laughed as Martha persistently asked whether we were going to do the zipline again. To try and discourage her we explained she’d have to walk up the hill again to go down again but then she looked at us like ‘ok when do we go?’ So we told her all the adults were too tired and we trudged back across the tidal spit back to the van.

The ride back seemed shorter and somehow we all fell asleep, despite being jostled relentlessly the whole way.

Back at the hotel we showered and wandered down to the outdoor lobby in search of a light, bubbly beer. We were told the hotel didn’t have any beer so we had to regroup. Looking at google maps we happened to see a brewery within walking distance so we decided to check it out.

Walking along the roads of Puerto Princesa is like walking along the roads of Monument Boulevard in Concord except it’s more humid, and there’s way more bugs and stray dogs. Finally we found the brewery, claimed to be the first and only craft brewery in Palawan. It felt like we were walking down someone’s driveway into their backyard. Then we came upon an outdoor dining area where several benches had been overturned and spiders had obviously claimed dominion over everything. We were about to turn away and render the excursion a failure when a guy came out from nowhere and pointed to a building to our right that said ‘Tap Room’ and had an open door.

As we walked up the steps and into the entrance we were followed by a staff person that turned on the lights, music, and fan. He opened two bottles of IPAs and poured us each a tall, overly foamy glass. We sat there and watched music videos on the tv while admiring the many geckos scurrying over the walls.

We googled a few places to eat but decided that we were overdue for trying Jollibee’s, the Filipino fast food chain. So we walked up to the mall area and found Jollibee’s nestled between McDonald’s and the other Filipino chain, Chow King. Carl ordered the spicy ChickenJoy (two pieces of fried chicken with rice and gravy) and I got the spaghetti and a buko (coconut) pie for desert. My spaghetti tasted like fresh Chef Boyardee. Carl’s enjoyed his spicy, tasty chickenjoy, especially the gravy which he poured over the packet of white rice.

We walked back to our hotel where we watched the Anthony Bourdain episode where he visits Manila and also orders Jollibee’s ChickenJoy and Spaghetti.