Sharing our Traveler's Diarya

Friday, February 18

Originally we had booked tickets from Medellín to Cusco arriving the morning of Sunday, February 20. We read that you should get train tickets to Machu Picchu many months in advance and to spend little time in Cusco before heading to Aguas Calientes (where Machu Picchu is) because Cusco is actually at higher elevation. So we got our train tickets for the afternoon of February 20 with plans to do MP early Monday, Feb 21.

Well first thing to go wrong was total cancellation of the original flight. We had booked through Viva airlines, which is Colombia’s version of Spirit. I spent many hours on their website trying to chat with a representative to change the flight without a fee and their internet kept dropping. Finally they said they changed it to a day earlier and we took a screenshot of the new itinerary which was smart because we never got an email confirmation. When we tried to check in online we kept getting error messages so I was skeptical whether we had a flight at all.

Luckily, at the airport in Medellín we were able to check in and they were totally nonplussed about it. We had a 19 hour layover in Lima from 8:30pm Friday to 3pm Saturday which worked out well for us to stay in Lima for one night. We had earned enough Marriott points through our Bonvoy credit card (#notanadd but Marriott feel free to start paying me for this free influencing) that we could stay for free at the Marriott AC in the touristy area, Miraflores. We got an Uber from the airport to the hotel and marveled at the Uber culture at the Lima airport where the driver had his location tracking from his phone in his pocket and he found us in the crowd by the door, asked us to wait there while he paid for parking, and then directed us to where his car was parked in the parking lot. This summary sounds smoother than what happened in reality, which involved much confusion over why the Uber tracker showed his car in the middle of the street, in the middle of a hoard of people when there were no cars to be seen- all the while people asking us to go in their taxi and/or showing us the Uber app on their phone as if that’s how it worked…

We finally made it to the hotel and could’ve kissed the person at the counter because the place was so nice and we knew this would be the last of our nice hotels. The hotel was right above the beach, so close that, when we opened the curtains in the morning, we only saw ocean. We had both been having stomach issues so we skipped dinner and fell asleep watching Titanic on tv.

Saturday, February 19

The next morning we walked around for a bit before getting breakfast. We went to an outdoor mall next to the hotel to find an ATM and there was a security guard asking to see our vaccine cards and for us to wear double masks. We meandered inland and found a cute little coffee shop and got delicious cappuccinos. Everyone walking on the street was wearing masks so we sipped our caps quickly and then put our masks back on, glaring at gringos who were unmasked and talking loudly.

We strolled through some parks and admired art vendors, lamenting that we couldn’t buy anything because we have no room in our bags. We decided to go to a little cafe for something small (bellies still unable to handle eggs or meat). Carl got a breakfast special: americano, fresh squeezed orange juice, and a grilled cheese sandwich all for 15 sols (about $3.75). I wish my grandpa were still alive so I could brag to him about how cheap we were eating but he’d probably still scoff and think everything was too expensive. I got avocado toast and a ‘lemonade’ which, to my delight, was limeade!

Afterwards we were able to get an Uber back to the airport and, despite traffic, made it on time and boarded. Because of our rebooking and late check in, Carl and I were not sitting next to each other, with him several rows behind me. The flight from Lima to Cusco is about an hour. As we descended I could see the steep, vibrant green peaks of the Andes, speckled with high mountain lakes. At the window seat behind the wing I could see the wings change shape, preparing to land. Just when I expected the sound of the wheels to lower, the plane raised back up again, wings shifted, and we were ascending. This had happened before when we went to the Amazon. In this time before we had circled twice above the airport before landing, presumably because of plane traffic.
This time, it felt like we circled twice and then we seemed to ascend more and go straight for a while. I wondered why we weren’t going down. They made an announcement but I couldn’t understand even the English translation. About 20 minutes later I realized with a drop of my stomach-we were going back to Lima. I prayed that as we descended below the clouds again I’d see those green peaks of Cusco. But, as we broke under the clouds, I could see flat, dry, urban land and…ocean. Not Chévere. I asked my neighbor ‘why we no go Cusco?’ and he rattled something back to me in which I heard ‘mucha lluvia’ : rain. This BOGGLED my mind. Wouldn’t they have checked the weather report before letting us take off from Lima? Were we circling for 20 minutes above Cusco hoping the rain would let up and then gave up? Did we run out of gas?

The plot thickens. Our friend, Karen, had booked her flight after us and was on a seemingly terrible series of flights from Medellín to Bogotá to Lima to Cusco. She had arrived for her layover in Lima just as we had taken off. Well, once we had landed in Lima AGAIN I messaged her, thinking to warn her that her flight from Lima to Cusco scheduled to depart an hour later would also be delayed or canceled. But no. She boarded her plane and took off and made it to Cusco all in less time than we spent waiting in line at the Viva service desk at the Lima airport trying to get a new flight or a refund. In all my days of traveling, this was new.
As we waited in line at the service counter, rumors spread and people grew anxious. We overheard a man leaving the line who said the next earliest flight was 7pm Sunday and that there were likely few of those seats left. We decided to book a new flight for early the next morning (Sunday) through a different budget airline, Sky, with our fingers crossed. We also booked a night at the hotel across the street from the Lima airport and messaged the hostel in Cusco that only 1/3 of us would make it that night.

When we finally got to the desk, the staff person looked fried and she had no patience to speak slower Spanish to us. She conveyed the next flight she could get us would be Monday morning. We asked if we could get a refund instead and she handed us a piece of paper with a list of phone numbers on it (calling Viva air at .25 cent a minute was about the last option we wanted!). We asked if she could at least give us proof that the flight was ‘canceled’ (though I pointed out we had made it to the air above Cusco, just not the ground) so we could file a claim with our travel insurance. She seemed to say if we called the number they could give us proof and then shooed us away while people behind us yelled ‘adelante’ meaning ‘move on already!’
I was dumbstruck that we spent two hours in line – twice as long as a flight to Cusco – just to get a piece of paper with a phone number on it. I don’t think Viva air cares about their reputation for customer service, but this was pretty bad.

However, as a guy behind us pointed out while we were betting over/under on estimated time in line, no one was dead, no one was hurt. Travel delays are the essence of travel and we could laugh and move on. Also, we heard that flights through other airlines had started to book up and get more expensive so we were grateful to have booked ours in line when we did. We also paid about $20 less for the airport hotel because I booked it through Booking.com rather than in person.

We pushed through all the yelling taxi men to literally walk across the street from the airport to the Wyndham, checked in, and were able to get pizza and pisco sours for a late dinner. The pisco sours were surprisingly tasty for an airport hotel and surprisingly STRONG. I said “I must feel it more because of the elevation” and Carl replied “We aren’t even at elevation- we’re still in Lima at sea level!”

Sunday, February 20

Again we were unable to check in online. The error message said ‘an error outside our control had occurred’. We woke up at 3:50am to make sure we could get through the line in time and get the eff on this plane. We flirted with fate as we chose the much shorter of two lines for check in/ baggage drop off and strained to hear why other Americans in the line next to us were arguing with the woman at the ticket counter. Again when we got to the desk they checked our passports and gave us boarding passes without seeming any bit concerned that their online check in process was completely broken. Though perhaps it was because of COVID they needed to see our vaccine card before every single step.

We made it through, boarded, and even found a spot in the overhead compartments for our bags. When we landed I cheered. The woman next to us noticed by joy and said she had also had troubles getting to Cusco.

It has been one month since we left the USA! To commemorate this marker of time I thought I’d share some general travel tips that we’ve learned along the way, some COVID tips, and some things to know about Colombia specifically.

General Travel Tips

• You’re on vacation, chill out! You’ll get there when you get there. A bad day of traveling is still an adventure.
• Don’t be such a gringo: Learn Spanish and don’t assume people will know English. You’re a guest and making impressions. Give natives priority and let them go first when possible. Don’t cut lines or expect any special treatment.
• You can’t sign into Venmo outside of the U.S. For cyber security purposes, I signed out of all of my accounts before leaving the US and use One Password app to sign in every time. Well, found out quickly that you can’t sign into Venmo at all outside the US so I guess Carl will have to wait a few months before I pay him back for many things Venmo, if you’re listening, this doesn’t make sense at all because if someone’s phone was stolen, they’d have to wait until they got back into the states to change their password.
• If you plan to go somewhere sunny and buggy, I recommend bringing a lightweight, light colored (white), long sleeve shirt. We brought some light long sleeves designed for chilly nights but we regret not bringing something for hiking in the Amazon and Colombian mountains.
• We brought the best boots and backpacks. My boots are Merrell, Carl’s are Timberlands and they both are designed for hiking trails but look fashionable enough to wear in city streets. Everyone and their mom asked us how we could wear our boots and seemed surprised when we said they were made for hiking and comfy, even on the last day of La Ciudad Perdida. We did not sustain any blisters yet, although I did put moleskin on my toe on the last day. Carl’s fared better than mine after La Ciudad Perdida but I think mine just need a good scrub to all be one shade of brown again. There are a ton of shoe shiners in the parks in Lima, maybe I’ll contribute to the local economy that way.

• Backpack cheat code. Our backpacks are both front loading style, Osprey brand. Mine is the Fairview 40L and Carl’s is the Porter 30L. I’ve had issues with closing mine when there is ANYTHING in the front compartment, but otherwise have been able to fit everything I need. Also because we have backpacks we haven’t had to check bags or pay extra fees on budget airlines (even though my backpack is probably bigger and weighs more than most of the tiny carry on suitcases!). Our bags also have good hip straps so we were able to use them as backpacking backpacks and to distribute weight better when walking from place to place. Even with my back problems I’m glad I went with a backpack rather than a rolling suitcase because few streets have been paved well enough to roll anything.

• Before we left I switched over to Carl’s T-mobile phone plan and am happy I did so. I think the standard T-mobile plan allows international free texting, 2G data (better some places than others!) and .25 cent/min calls. We’ve only had to make two very short calls (once when we couldn’t find rental call shuttle and once when the hostel in Bogotá seemed totally shut at 3am when we arrived). The data is really slow but we have been able to find some kind of WiFi in most places, even if it’s slow or intermittent. What’s app seems to work no matter what is going on, and has been a great way of communicating with international numbers.
• Don’t forget your earplugs and bring an extra pair for your friend that does forget.

COVID Traveling Tips

• Avoid layovers in the U.S. When we went from Sint Maarten to Bogotá we had a layover in Miami and we had to show proof of negative covid test for US requirements. We had purchased at home PCR tests but they didn’t accept these so we had to pay ~$60 each to get rapid tests done a few hours before the flight- unnecessary stress!
• So far Sint Maarten, Colombia, and Peru have required electronic affidavits when entering and leaving the country. Sint Maarten required us to check in and record our temperature every day for the first 5 days. Only two places in Colombia required proof of vaccination: the bar by the wall, Cafe Del Mar, and to board the Catamaran, Bona Vida. In Peru so far we had to show our vaccine card to get into an outdoor mall and they required us to wear two masks. In many places in Peru (airports) they require two masks.

Colombia Tips

• SPANISH. At the airport and in touristy areas like big cities and Cartagena we found some people knew English well. But, for the most part, many people we interacted with had very little English. I loved this because it forced us to use our Spanish skills instead of in Puerto Rico where people would automatically switch to English with me. I’d recommend learning a few Spanish phrases and food items before visiting to avoid frustration and show good manners to the hosts.

• NICE. Every Colombian we met was SO nice. I think the most frustrating time we had was checking into the hotel in Tyrona where the woman talked so fast and seemed to have an attitude. Everyone else has been happy to repeat things slower when we ask and it seemed like people were willing to help us in other ways besides language too. As an example, in Medellín when we got metro tickets the cashier man was very patient, explained one line was closed but helped us get tickets for another, and even smiled!

• COFFEE and TEA. In (I think) every other Spanish speaking place, the word ‘tinto’ means red wine. In Colombia, it also means black coffee. This was a surprise to us when for breakfast one morning we were offered tinto! Also aromáticas means tea, in case that’s what you’re into.

• FRUIT. Not so much a tip but perhaps a reason to visit. Every hotel breakfast we had started with fresh fruit and juice. Fruit is usually papaya, pineapple, and sometimes mango or cantaloupe. Every street had vendors selling fruit including Mango Biche which is green mango with salt and lime. Every restaurant has (seemingly) fresh fruit juice, our favorites being: Maracuya (passion fruit), Sandía (watermelon) and Lemonade (limeade!).

• TOILET PAPER. Most bathrooms have a toilet paper dispenser right when you walk into the room and do not have individual dispensers in each of the stalls. This means you need to check with yourself first and think about how much you might need. Some bathrooms had no toilet paper at all so we stole a role from a hotel and carried it around with us. Also most bathrooms have signs asking you to throw dirty TP into the trash, not the toilet.

• HEADPHONES. No one has them. Airplanes are LOUD with the sounds of music videos, candy crushing, and everything else. I don’t know if people have them and don’t use them but people seem confused when I glare at them and I haven’t had the confidence to tell anyone to turn the volume down, especially because 4 other people are listening to something just as loud. The cake topper was a guy behind me whose notification sound was a rooster cockle-doodle-dooing AT FULL VOLUME. I guess he didn’t turn on airplane mode either because it went off about five times and gave me such a fright each time.

• FLYING. Don’t try to book flights from one small place to another. Even from Medellín to Cusco it was impossible to get a direct flight and most went through Bogotá AND Lima. Also the budget airlines are cheap for a reason. Be warned.

• CHÉVERE. Colombians use the word, Chévere, to describe something cool. Like, “how was the hike?” “Chévere!”

Thursday, February 17

Originally we had played to stay 2.5 days in Medellín and have read that maybe we should’ve stayed even longer but we had a flight to Peru that got canceled so we had to reschedule to a day before to make sure we don’t miss the train to Machu Picchu. So, we had only about 24 hours to see Medellín AND the weather forecast predicted rain for most of it.

We landed about noon and got a ride to our hotel. We were staying in the Poblado neighborhood which is a popular spot for foreigners and tourists to Medellín. We dropped off our stuff and set out right away to not waste any daylight. We walked down the main road in Poblado, Calle 10. We got some street food -arepas and empanadas- so we could eat but keep moving.
We then went to the metro because we wanted to ride the famous cable car up to the top of the mountain to see the park up there and take in some city views. Well (of course) the highest cable car, line L, was closed until Tuesday due to annual maintenance. We could still take a lower cable car to a neighborhood so we opted for this option. Carl purchased a metro card and 6 rides for us and we joined the early commuter traffic. The first part was riding the blue line for a bit and then we transferred to the cable car which was just the gondolas they have in ski resorts. At this moment Karen reminded us that she is afraid of heights. We tried to do our best to tell her when we were approaching the next station so she would be prepared for the jostle and bump. She handled it well.

We rode to the top and got out and walked around a bit. There were street vendors but otherwise the area didn’t feel touristy, it felt like any neighborhood in a big city. From the street we noticed a rooftop bar that looked like a good place to have a beer and people watch. To get to it we ended up having to go through a two-story grocery store and up an iron, spiral staircase. The bar was deserted but we were able to order a couple beers and a passion fruit juice.

We headed back down and admired the view of the whole city below us, and the rain clouds threatening ever closer from the South. We made it back to Poblado without rain and spotted a craft brewery spot. The owner? manager? was very nice and invited us to sit down outside. Carl had an IPA and I had the hoppy amber and they were hands down the best beers we’ve had in Colombia. While we sat outside and chatted we watched three different people pay off the parking police so they wouldn’t get a ticket.

When we hiked Ciudad Perdida we heard some of the Colombian women mention El Rancherito (a local chain) as a good place for Colombian food in Medellín. We noticed there was one of these within walking distance of where we were staying so we decided to make the trek for dinner. It was then we realized how steep the hills of Medellín are and that we should’ve studied a topo map before making our dinner plans. As we trudged up the hill Karen said ‘I bet ya God’s waiting at the top of this hill! And his tapping his foot, looking at his watch”

We finally made it and were surprised how close the outdoor tables were to the freeway. Still, we ordered the bandeja paisa – the traditional Colombian dish with everything on it, and some Refrajo, the beer shandy honey mix we had tried before. The food was good but the waiter forgot we were there so we had to eat off one plate with only spoons.

We were able to walk downhill back to the hotel and it still hadn’t rained!

Friday, February 18

The weather forecast said it wouldn’t rain until the afternoon so we left our rain jackets behind and set out for a morning adventure (foreshadowing). We got a taxi to a museum called Casa de la Memoria. The museum is a tribute to victims of armed conflict that have plagued Colombia in recent history. There was a surprising amount of information in English but there was also heaps of documents in only Spanish,like newspaper articles, that could be accessed through interactive displays so we did our best to read through and understand.

After the museum we got a taxi back to Poblado to get some lunch and make sure we had time to get to the airport before our flight to Peru. We decided to eat at a gastropub called Gato which catered to English speaking tourists and had too much on their menu. I got a passion fruit soda which was like someone had peeled a passion fruit and plopped it into soda water. We got chorizo that was good but made the mistake of thinking Thai noodles would be interesting to try. They were fine but we should’ve stuck to our rule of only Colombian food in Colombia.

Of course, as we wrapped up our meal and contemplated the walk back up the steep hill to the hotel, it started to rain. It didn’t rain hard so we tried to speed hike and made it back mostly dry and in time for an airport taxi.

¡Vamos a Peru!

Monday, February 14

We had about a 3.5 hour drive from Santa Marta to Cartagena, mostly along the desert-y coast. When we got to Cartagena we finally met up with…our friend Karen!!!
The last time we saw her was in India on a trip we did many years ago.

We all walked around the beautiful walled city and decided to get something to eat. We opted for a restaurant called San Valentin because it was Valentine’s Day!! Carl and I shared ceviche and a seafood stew to celebrate being near the coast and we ordered Karen a bunch of sides because she is vegetarian and that’s all they had without meat. We also got Maracuya (passion fruit) juice and it was sooo good. I don’t think I can go back to not having fresh fruit juice at every meal!

After lunch we walked around the old town a bit and then went to the wall to a popular restaurant on top the wall (Cafe del Mar) to watch the sunset over the ocean. This was the first time we had to show our vaccine cards to get in, which was ironic because the restaurant was entirely outdoors and the wind was SO strong that the waitresses could barely hold onto their trays. We ordered some fancy cocktails and watched as the sky turned lighter blue to different shades of light pink and orange.

Walking back to our hotel we decided to get one more small thing to eat. We popped into a random restaurant and they ended up having live music. It was a guy singing with his acoustic guitar and a lot of people in the restaurant were singing along. I got the best Mojito I’ve had in Colombia (Puerto Rico still wins) and we got some Patacones which are fried plantains (tostones) with stuff on top. Karen was exhausted from her 26 hour voyage from Europe and we were still tired from the hike so we decided to have an early night.

Tuesday, February 15

We started the day off with a free walking tour within the old, walled city. Our guide’s name was Edgar and he was very good at his job. He remembered everyone’s name in our tour group and would ask us trivia questions about our home country during the tour. From him we learned that the elaborate door knockers on some of the old doors are representative of who used to live there. For example, a lion represents military or government, fish represents a fisherman, mermaid represents commerce, and lizard represents royalty. I asked Edgar what would represent a medical profession but he didn’t know. We saw one door that looked like a lion dog demon and someone in the group said ‘lawyer’.

At the end of the tour Edgar advised us where to eat lunch. He recommended San Valentin (where we ate the day before!) and a cheaper place where the locals go, outside the walled city, called Coroncoro. One of the tour participants said that’s where he planned to go for lunch anyways so we joined him and went together in a little group. His name was Sean and he was from Florida. He was the only tourist used to the heat and able to wear pants like a local. We also made friends with a woman named La Donna who lives in Brooklyn and she joined us for lunch too. Sean lead the way because he had visited Cartagena before and had eaten outside the walled city previously. We went to the neighborhood Getsemaní which used to be riddled with crime but perhaps because of this was overlooked by ugly 1980s development and had retained the same old style buildings and streets. The first street we walked down had flags across the top but it seemed that every street after had some other decoration across the top like kites, butterflies, and flags.

Coroncoro was definitely a locals spot. The waitress pulled up chairs to a table where people were already eating and she barked at us to sit. Finally when we ordered she gave us less than 30 seconds to speak. I tried to tell her that Karen is vegetarian so she just wanted all the sides, but not a main. The waitress heard ‘Ella es vegetar-‘ and she replied “no!” and moved onto the next customer. Finally we were able to get food ordered for everyone and I got the biggest passion fruit juice I’ve had here for 7,000 pesos (less than $2) and loved every sip.

After lunch we walked around the neighborhood with our new friends. We admired the old buildings and all the street art. We spotted a craft beer bar and decided to take a peek. The bartender offered that we could sample beers before getting a whole pint. We asked to try number 6 (seis) and she gave us number 3 (tres). Then we asked for number 4 (cuatro) and she gave us 7 (siete). The first time I could understand the mix up but the second time was just funny. So we asked for 6 and 4 again, and 15. At this point she thought we wanted to try all of them and started giving us a look. I ended up going with #1, Happy Tucan, because Carl had it in Santa Marta and I knew it was good. Carl went with #6, an IPA from Lino brewery in Bogotá. There was a soccer game on the tv playing so we got some beers and watched the game, pretending to be invested in Real Madrid vs some Paris team.

By this time it was afternoon and so hot. Luckily our hotel had a pool on the roof that was the shape of a giant bath tub. We all got in and then watched the beginning of the sunset from the pool chairs on the roof.

For dinner that night, Carl and I met up with the German couple we had met while hiking La Ciudad Perdida, Susie and John. They are also vegetarian but they seemed to know where to look for a veggie friendly place to eat. They chose a tapas place in the Getsemaní neighborhood and we ended up ordering all the vegetarian tapas to share. It was a nice break from eating meat with absolutely every meal!

After dinner we walked around a bit. Even though it was only Tuesday there were a ton of people out in the streets and there were street performers in the main square. We watched the organized street performers and then a drunken? woman who was actually pretty good at dancing intervened in their routine- she was twerking and eventually did a flash dance move on top of a police car that was actually hilarious though I think the real dancers didn’t think it was so funny. We found ourselves near the same craft beer bar we had been at earlier so we thought – why not?! — and went back. Luckily the same bartender wasn’t there because she thought we were weird enough sampling 6 beers before and now we were back with two DIFFERENT English-speaking friends. We were worried they were going to think we were scamming couples somehow and shmoozing them over beers. Carl said, ‘either way we are bringing business to them!’

Wednesday, February 16

Woke up early and headed to the port to board a catamaran. Cartagena is in the Carribean and although the water around the city itself is not aquamarine and no beaches around the old part, the tropical paradise is a short boat ride away. As we left the mainland we were fascinated with all the beautiful high-rises with their wall to ceiling windows. We yelled ‘what’s the rent?!’ but no one responded. It seems like Cartagena has the benefit of Carribean climate without the risk of a direct hit from a hurricane, but they have been flooded by hurricane remnants before.

Out past Bocagrande we were in the open ocean. The boat swung down to the Rosario Islands and anchored offshore. We borrowed some snorkels and swam out to some rockier areas. Just when we found the good spot I pulled my head up and realized we were in a channel way. Boats blasting music were whizzing by us. The staff on our boat were motioning us to come back closer to the boat. Begrudgingly, we did, and tried to see more fish at deeper depths where the rock borders the grass. Despite this restriction we did see a bunch of little fish including a parrot fish which is one of my favorites. Swimming back to the boat we saw Karen had waded in and was taking pics with her go pro.

Then the boat drove to the next location, back on the mainland but still in the national natural park, south of the city. We had a yummy lunch of seafood rice and fruit. Bellies full, we jumped in the water again and this time were able to swim to the beach and further from the boat. There wasn’t as much reefs or reef life here, but still we saw some colorful fish and lots of beautiful dead coral that had washed up onto the shore. Finally we had to head back. The way back to the port was ridiculously choppy and the people sitting in the front on the boat hammocks got absolutely drenched. I had to sit in the back and stare at the distant shoreline to focus on not getting sick.

We got back to the hotel and showered and then walked out for dinner. We went back to Getsemaní because we saw street food we wanted to try. First we got some arepas. Karen got plain cheese and she loved it. Carl and I split the ‘Colombian’ which had some different meats and potato something in it. Then we meandered down to the main square to see what else was looking good. We saw a huge crowd around one vendor and had to watch for a while to see what they were making and how to order it. We ended up getting Patacones with everything. Patacones basically is the same as tostones (fried plantain) but in Colombian restaurants some places add different toppings. This street food was like Colombian Poutine- the fried plantains were on the bottom followed by layers of sauce, corn, shredded potatoes, chorizo, ham, bacon, and who knows what else. It was a heaping plate of food and it was so good. We stood in the square and ate it and tried our best to finish it all.

Thursday, February 10

We packed up our stuff and said goodbye to paradise, walked up the hill to the main road to await our ride to the start of the hike. We had done some research on hiking ciudad perdida but overall I imagined backpacking with a small group of people and a couple guides and sleeping out in the forest in hammocks. We quickly realized that it was more of a scout camp experience, with many people and picnic bench type infrastructure, which was fun in its own way. We waited by the side of the road for a while until finally a van pulled up and somehow recognized us and told us to get in. Inside was a Colombian family- mom, dad, and teenage daughter. We were quiet at first-not knowing whether we were in the right van and whether we were all going to the same place- but finally we started talking with the family and learned that they lived and worked on a guesthouse/farm about an hour outside of Cali and they had never done the lost city hike before but were very excited for it. After about an hour in the van we got out onto a busy commercial street that was crowded with other tourist vans and huge tourist buses. There was about 100 people there- getting their wristbands for the hike and buying last minute waters, flash lights and candy. Our Colombian family quickly adopted us and herded us to the right spot as they were able to hear and understand what was happening better than we did. We got our wristbands and climbed back into the van for a very windy hour long drive to the base camp, a tiny town called El Mamey. It was about 1pm at this point and we were wondering when we were going to get on the trail and were eager to get walking. They told us we would have lunch first and then hike in the afternoon. This seemed like a terrible idea to me- to go uphill with a full belly during the hottest part of the day- but days later could see the logic to the schedule. It was about this point that we realized we were with a large group, I think 24 people and 3 guides. Over the next 4 days we met nearly everyone:

Guides:
• Eddie – guide who normally guides Tyrona park but it was closed. He spoke Spanish, English, and French.
• José – the main guide, part of the indigenous group, the Wiwa.
• T – another Wiwa guide who at first seemed very serious but quickly became the smiley one of the group

People:
• Our Colombian family: Mom: Esmeralda, dad: Juan, and daughter: Sara. Juan was a very fit and fast hiker and was always in the lead, often going ahead of the guides which I’m not sure they liked. Esmeralda was a little slower but always ready to go. She would be the first to say after a break “let’s go now??!” and on several occasions looked after Carl and I including making sure we got beds one night. Sara had just finished high school and was about to start college for graphic design. Before we lost service she showed me her beautiful nature photos on Instagram. She had a nice camera and was pointing out animals and birds along the whole trek.
• There were 8 Colombian women who at first seemed like they all went to the same college but then we found out some of them were quite a bit older. They spoke so fast I could never understand what they were saying and we didn’t get a chance to talk to them much because they were in their group.
• There was a German couple: Susie and John (pronounced: Yawn). John had recently broken his clavicle and ripped all the tendons in his shoulder while snowboarding in Austria so he had his right arm in a sling and made everyone very nervous when he ascended and descended steep slopes. Susie carried their large bag and was good at looking after him because she had just finished medical school and was about to do her residency as an OBGYN.
• There were three Canadian women who worked at the Canadian embassy. They were very nice and interesting but only gave pity laughs when I asked how much I needed to bribe them to get me Canadian citizenship and free healthcare. We spoke with Elodie and Corina, but didn’t get the name of the other one or her boyfriends name. The BF lived in Colombia with her but he worked remotely for a tech company somewhere in North America.
• There were several young Europeans traveling solo: Nicholas was French, Josh (pronounced Yash) was German, and Rosanne was Belgian. We spoke with Josh and Rosanne a lot and relied on them for their superior Spanish skills.
• There was also an older French couple from Paris. The man took many videos with his super tiny (spy?) camera and the woman didn’t speak much Spanish or English but seemed to enjoy herself despite painful looking blisters on day 2 and having to take mule or moto for the end of the hike.

Finally we set off and it was mostly uphill for 2.5 hours to the first camp. The trail was wide and dusty. The whole group marched along together. We stopped many times which frustrated the eager hikers but was probably for the best because the beginning was not very shady and we were all dripping with sweat. This beginning helped us realize the hike would not be easy but that we were in it together. At one point I bought some fresh squeezed orange juice from a woman in a stand by the trail (in the middle of nowhere) and it was soooo good and gave me enough energy to get to the end of the day.

When we got to the camp I was a little disappointed with how it looked – function over form- but it ended up being a comfortable place to stay. There were 4 long picnic tables, an open air kitchen, two long rows of bunk beds with mosquito netting, and several toilets and showers (with cold water). They offered hammocks but Esmeralda sagely warned us against them, noting we would sleep better in a bed. Choosing beds was a free for all and Carl and I got stuck with two top bunks. The mosquito netting was tied to the roof which was so close to the bed that Carls net hung in his face. They fed us dinner – delicious Mojarro Roja again! and we went to sleep very early at 9. I was grateful for earplugs because there were two snorers and one guy sounded like he was dying.

Friday, February 11

They woke us up at 5 and served breakfast at 530, telling us to get on the trail at 6. It was beautiful to watch the sun come up and we were eager to walk before it got too hot.

From this point the trail narrowed to a single track and we felt more like we were really backpacking. We trekked through the jungle- mostly shaded by large tropical trees and sweeping vines- but hot and humid as the devils armpit. There were some parts where the banana trees were taller than a two story building. It was interesting to see the dirt change from gray mud to white sand to red rock and mud. There were many mules being led to carry bags or people up and down the trail. When we saw one we would yell ‘MULA!’ so people behind would know to make way. (We still got dangerously close to the back of a few as we passed by and I could practically hear Carls heightened fear of large hooved animals).

Some parts were rolling flat but most of it was steep uphill to a beautiful vista followed immediately by steep downhill to a river crossing, and over and over again. We crossed through many farm areas and indigenous villages. We would often hear something as we came around the corner to see that there was a cow or a child hiding behind a tree. The indigenous people all wore white tunics and had long straight black hair parted in the middle. The girls wore many layers of beads and the boys always had a bag slung across their shoulder. We were surprised at how often we ran into indigenous people from different indigenous groups on the trail and it made us realize we were truly guests walking through their land.

The first part of the day was 3 hours to a hut near a river and waterfall. I’ve never sweat so much in all my life and Carl looked like someone had poured a bucket of water over him, his ‘white’ shirt was completely see through. When we got there we got to swim around the waterfall and then walked down to the river where we could jump in. The water was very cold but it felt so good after being drenched in sweat.

We ate lunch at the camp here and then had an intense four hour afternoon hike to the next camp. We walked fast, my motivation was to get a better bunk spot that night. But when we arrived they said beds would be assigned once everyone got there. It seemed the Colombian women had also been unlucky to all get top bunks so the guide waited for them to get there and assign things more fairly. When it came our turn to get a bed, José asked us each for a hat. He then went into the bunk area and put the hats on the beds. He didn’t tell us where they were or ask us to follow so we had to go look – bunk by bunk- pulling up the mosquito netting to see which was ours. The two rows of bunks were very close at this site – about a foot apart and the ladder to get to the top bunk was on the side between the bunks so it was so congested. We discovered we could access our top and bottom bunk from the back, outer side and found ropes to hang all our clothing which was wet with sweat or because we had washed it in the shower. I’ve never smelled so bad in my life so clean wet clothes were better than smelly wet ones.

That night after dinner they made a campfire and talked about the indigenous tribes in the area (there are 4 that share rights to the Ciudad Perdida), explaining customs and answering our questions. They explained how men carry around a Dom Burra – a gourd that has lime powder which helps with absorption of coca- and that they use to fiddle with to contemplate life during down times.

Saturday, February 12

Finally on the third day we made it to the Ciudad Perdida. From the camp it was a short walk to the base of the stairs where there were ~2,000 steps to the top. The steps were varying heights and some were slick so it was like being on a treacherous stair stepper for about an hour. Luckily we were able to leave our bags at camp so we felt much lighter for this especially steep ascent.

Finally we reached La Ciudad Perdida, the Lost City, which is a misnomer because the local tribes had known of its existence but the Europeans ‘discovered’ it and ‘relocated’ found objects back to museums in Europe. The current site still has round rock foundations where buildings used to sit, and has been cleaned and maintained for tourists to marvel at. Our guides explained some of the areas and spoke more about what they believed life was like for the people that used to use the site.

We followed a series of ascending circular platforms to the top of the city which had a great view of the lower areas and the surrounding mountains. There was also a friendly cat lounging in the sun on one of the terraces that I think everyone took a picture of. They served us some snacks – fruit and chips- at the top before we descending back down the staircase of death.

The entire trail is out and back so from this point on, we would be retracing our steps. We got down the mountain and made it back to the camp where we slept the night before in time for lunch. Some of us dipped our bodies in the river while we waited for the rest of the group to arrive and for lunch to be prepared. Some of us formed a sort of coalition to try to make it to the night camp before 6 (sunset) so we could hop in the river again. Me and Carl, Susie, Yahn, Rosanne, Corina, and our Colombian family practically sprinted to make it in time.

I hadn’t slept well yet so I was starting to drag. At lunch I had a coffee with extra sugar and was hyper and ready to hike – until we got to the large uphill and then I felt like I wasn’t going to make it. This is where the psychic power of being part of a group of motivated humans kicks in and I could see past my pain to imagine the glory of jumping into that river. As we sprinted it started to rain and Carl and I lost some distance from the group when we stopped to cover our bags. The cold rain water motivated us but it seemed like we were going to make it in time. But, when we got to the camp it was only 4:45! We were all so happy! Then our guide T, who had led the sprint, said we couldn’t swim because the rain might cause the current of the river to be dangerous. The ironic disappointment! Oh the sad faces of the crushed hearts of our weary friends! Some members of the group debated whether to go anyways, despite being told we weren’t allowed to. Then T said he would ‘check out the conditions’ with us which meant we could go in. Without waiting, me, Susie and Rosanne got our suits on an headed down to the river with T running after us to be our lifeguard. Then the boys joined us and we were only swimming for about 20 minutes, but it was a glorious 20 minutes.

That night, again, we had bunks assigned haphazardly (thanks to Mama Esmeralda who saw me and told the guide I still needed a bed). This time the bunks were arranged side by side with the ladder at the foot so that neighbors were sleeping parallel with bed frames touching so bodies were about a foot apart. Luckily the mosquito netting creates a barrier so it wasn’t so awkward.

It was about this point people were breaking down- realizing they were sunburned, having diarrhea, feeling the exhaustion post-excitement. After dinner I crawled into the top bunk to read but could barely get through one chapter before falling asleep. Carl was in the dining room for long enough to hear joke time which he repeated to me later. The best joke was (in Spanish):

What’s the funniest fruit?

The naranja ja ja ja !

Sunday, February 11

The last day. It hurt to stand up, sit down, and especially taking the first few steps I was like a baby deer with shaky legs. But once we were on the trail we picked up our fast pace again and trucked on. Up, down, up, down. Finally we arrived at the last break stop, which was the camp we had stayed on the first night. They served us fresh squeezed lulo juice and then we had the final descent. My knees felt like jelly and although the morning had gone by faster than expected, the last bit of trail seemed to drag on and on. We were passed by several of our friends who had opted to pay for a motorcycle ride to the bottom. Finally we made it to the lunch spot- same as the very first day before we had started- and the people that had arrived already cheered us on and congratulated us for making it to the end. It was so sweet and warm hearted that it made me uncomfortable and want to cry with joy. When everyone had arrived we had lunch – Mojarra Roja! And then got in vans for the 2+ hour journey back down the windy road and along the freeway to Santa Marta. T was thoughtful to get everyone’s WhatsApp just before we departed and he started a group chat so we could stay connected, share photos, and travel recommendations for future adventures. I had thought we would be doing a nature-oriented backpacking trip and although I had originally been disappointed that the trek seemed like Girl Scout camp all over again, by the end I was so grateful to have met so many kind, adventurous, interesting people and gotten to spend good quality, sweaty time to get to know them.

We rode back with our Colombian family and Yash to the travel agency office in Santa Marta where we collected our bag we had left behind and walked to our hotel, Casa Verde. Exhausted and smelly x 1,000, the first thing we did was shower and dump all our dirty clothes out of our bag.

Santa Marta

Though we could’ve slept at 5pm we decided to see a little bit of Santa Marta. Our hotel was perfectly located. We walked just a few blocks to the beach where it seemed everyone in the city was playing in the calm water or burying each other in the sand. There were also throngs of people walking along the promenade with their nice outfits and their little dogs. Sunday at the beach!

From there we walked to a main square called the Parque de los Novios Centro. There were so many people out, strolling around and enjoying the perfect temperature of the late afternoon. We decided to go to Radio Burger because we saw it listed on a best restaurant list. We sat outside and got a passion fruit margarita and a really good red craft beer. We got a really good chorizo app and a burger that ended up not having much on it, but the sauce was good. Although there was night life to be had, we were extremely exhausted so we decided to have an early night.

Tuesday, February 8

We were sad to say goodbye to our hosts, Kathia and Jorge, and to the town of Barichara. We got into a taxi and he drove us to the airport in Bucaramanga which was about a 3.5 hour drive. We took the “main road” which conveys all the big rigs and all the taxis and all the personal cars through the steep, windy canyons of Santander. For my Californians out there, imagine the traffic from the 5 on a road like Highway 1. This is not an exaggeration. And it is common to pass two or three trucks at once, just in time before turning a corner, next to a cliff. Our driver played a playlist he had titled “THE BEST” which included the WORST American music, basically 80s hits and dad rock. So Carl and I had our headphones in for the ride.

The Bucaramanga airport is unique because it sits on the very top of a mesa – with a view across the valley of the city on an opposite mesa.

Upon arriving in Santa Marta we had another drive, for one hour, to the Naranjos area where there were very nice but reasonably priced hotels on the beach. The hotel our travel agency picked was actually their second pick because the first was full, so we didn’t know what to expect. Walking up, it was like walking into a paradise. The trees that lined the path bowed with the weight of beautiful bright pink and red flowers. When we entered the lobby we saw two pools nestled between palm thatched huts and the ocean waves lapping just beyond a pretty, exotic garden.

The woman at the front desk spoke very fast. There were many instructions for checking in and we were pretty tired from traveling all day. She said something would happen at eight and when I politely asked her to repeat she said “oooccchhoo”. So I stopped asking and nodded along. No matter, they fed us dinner even though we had arrived late and I think it was the best chicken I’ve had in a while. When she showed us our room we couldn’t believe it. We had a wrap around porch right on the beach!

Wednesday, February 9

With no real plans for the day, we decided to see if we could hike into the Tyrona National Park which was located right next to us, across a sand spit. The day started cloudy but as soon as the sun came out we could feel it beating down on us. We managed to cross the sand spit -despite the strong current of the river pushing into the ocean and the ocean waves hitting us – and then saw a sign saying watch out for crocodiles near the river mouth. 😬

We ambled along the beach and eventually found a trail into the park. The flora and fauna was like the Amazon but flatter and sandier. We walked for a little bit until it appeared the trail had been closed so we walked back to the beach. As we meandered back, Carl spotted a ripe coconut and deftly knocked it down with one throw of a rock. He then brought it to a big piece of driftwood on the beach and used the rock to crack it open. It took a while, but not as long as I expected. Finally he was able to drip some coconut water into his mouth. Some other people came by and ogled at him, looking jealous. As Carl started to get into the meat of the coconut, the National Park police showed up. Apparently the whole park was closed until the 15th. We apologized for trespassing and quickly left. We offered them some coconut but they said no, gracias.

Upon returning back to our hotel we ran into some other Californians staying there. We found out that the guy, Keegan, lives in Sn Francisco and his girlfriend, Lanni, lives in Puerto Rico, and they were vacationing for 2 weeks in Colombia. We spent some time in the pool chatting with them and then agreed to have dinner together that night.

Carl and I then walked into ‘town’ to find something authentic for lunch. We walked along the highway. There was no sidewalk and minimal shade. There was an occasional breeze and big rigs blasting us with a wake of hot air. The first road side shack we came to had lunch advertised but there was a child working the snack booth and I wasn’t confident that he knew proper food handling safety procedures. The next shack had woven palm leaf sides and a corrugated iron roof. It was dark inside but we could see there were several people sitting around a plastic table and an older woman in the kitchen. She looked like she knew what she was doing so we asked if they had lunch. They said yes and then everyone cleared out to let us have the one table. There was no menu but she offered us something in Spanish and we said sounds good. We asked for some bottled water and she said they weren’t cold because she didn’t have power but somehow she still had some ice that she kindly put into glasses for us. We normally share plates, especially lunch, but we hadn’t really ordered so we each got a full plate of food. The matriarch served us a whole fried fish: Mojarra Roja (like tilapia) and it was some of the best fish I’ve ever had. She also gave us salad, rice and fried plantains. Carl usually eats too fast and I usually eat too slow. I was especially slow picking out every bit of fish meat from the bones while swatting away all the flies. At one point she motioned to me how better to swat the flies away (slower broad sweeps, not tiny fast ones). While we ate people stopped by to say hello or buy things. At one point a younger guy showed up with a small box and inside were TWO chickens. An older man that had been hanging out grabbed the white one with black spots and held it like a pet. Then at one point he pulled something – a feather?- out from the wing. He then put this feather in his mouth and bit it? Flossed with it? I’ve never seen anyone do anything like this with a chicken so my memory fails me on exactly what he was doing but I just know I’ve never seen that before. They then threw the chicken in the yard across the highway and went about their day.
Finally it was time to pay (we made a gringo mistake of eating before asking the price!) and she told us 56,000 pesos which is about 14 dollars. So about $7 each for a huge plate of food and a cold bottle of water- not bad! She then delighted in learning how to say 56 in English and she repeated it to all of her family that started to filter in as we were leaving. We walked back to our hotel and read by the pool until dinner.

Having dinner with another couple was really fun because it felt very adult and sophisticated. Keegan was an amazing conversationalist and we got to know them and share our stories, all cracking up by the end of dinner. We agreed to visit him sometime in SF and maybe even go to burning man with them in the fall.

Monday, February 7

If you want to learn Spanish like your life depends on it, try going rafting in one of the biggest canyons in the world, the Chicamocha River.

We had a driver pick us up promptly at 8 am and drive us for a little under an hour to a nearby town called San Gil. Here we got out and into a rafting van with our rafting guide, Christian, safety officer, Kevin, and organizer, Grace. We drove along the main road for a while, which is like highway 1 in CA (curvy as heck) and then they said it would be another 1.5 hour along a steeper, more windy, dirt road (hold on to your tetas). As we jostled along on the benches in the back of the van, Christian told us all about the area and the Chicamocha which means “silver thread under a full moon light” in the native language. Finally we arrived in a teeny tiny town called Jordan which had an old tiny bridge that used to be one of the only passages over the river. From here we got out the raft and began the real fun.

Christian explained every potential scenario of what could go wrong whilst rafting and he did so in Spanish. My Spanish is just good enough that I caught the gist of all the terrible possibilities but didn’t commit to memory all the commands and actions I was supposed to do. Luckily, Carl saw the terror in my eyes and comforted me that he used to guide the same class of rapids, about 3+. For my mother’s sake I’ll jump to the conclusion where everything was fine and we left the river with all our body parts and clothes. Actually the scariest part was the very first rapid where we went over a tiny waterfall. With my hands still shaking from the adrenaline the guide pulled the raft over and asked if we wanted to jump off a tall rock into the water. I thought he was joking but Carl was eager and out of the boat before I could make a sarcastic comment.

From there we encountered about 15 rapid sections total, with one called the blender where we spun around in a circle the whole way. Christian would shout, “adelante suave” or “adelante fuerte” meaning forward easy or forward strong. A few times he said “izquierda adelante, derecha atrás” meaning left forward and right backward. I was proud of my ability to hear, comprehend and act quickly. Carl still has some trouble with his left and right. The canyon was gorge-ous (haha) and apparently the second largest canyon in the world after the Grand Canyon. Christian pointed out different old rocks and trees and we did some bird watching but we were not as good at identifying without our Amazonian guide, Elvis.

Finally we reached a point where two rivers converge and we got out and hiked up a huge hill to where Grace had the van. She had also laid out a beautiful spread for lunch that included multiple types of grilled meat, yucca, guacamole, and…ants! We tried a little of everything and went back for seconds on the chorizo and ants.

Then they brought out the Aguardiente. This is a fermented drink from sugarcane, etc. (like schnapps). Christian explained that while the rapids were class 3, the road we had to drive to get back was considered class 5. He advised that we take a few shots so that if we happen to look over the edge, the alcohol would reduce our fear and anxiety. Well he was right across all fronts- the road was terrifying but we had a great time conversing and joking as Grace drove us, over boulder by boulder, up the hill. We changed hands again in a town called Villanueva and were driven back to our finca.

For dinner that night we went into town with the best Tuk Tuk driver, Cesar, who promised to pick us up at the end of the night too. We went to the house of a woman named Margarita. She had an old house in town with a huge garden and kitchen. She offers cooking classes and specializes in cooking native recipes and creating things with plants. She offered to show us how best to cook ants and served us a tasty dinner of ant arepas and ants sprinkled on cheese wrapped in some kind of leaf. She had us taste every version of ant- rare, medium rare, well done (the best), with salt, lemon, something spicy, yeast, and honey. She also had us sample her many dried goods – tons of dried fruit and who knows what else. She said she even dehydrated water…

Saturday, February 5

We hit the road early, still slightly rainy outside. Again, Stephan talked the whole way sharing his wealth of knowledge about the region. We admired the scenery change as we dropped in elevation from high desert to an agricultural area where they grow coffee, sugarcane, and other fruits and vegetables. The traffic was made worse by the donkeys (burros) carrying the sugarcane up the hill to the plants where they burn off the water to get pure sugar.

We stopped at a local shop to get some bocadillos- square sugary candies made from guava fruit. I recognized these guava squares wrapped in banana leaves because my colleague Manny (whose wife is from Colombia) used to feed them to me to keep my spirits up in the afternoon when we worked in Puerto Rico after Hurricane Maria. We tried the bocadillos the local way, with a piece of cow cheese that had ripened within a banana leaf (queso de oja). It was ¡DELICIOSA! We bought a sampler pack of candies with different flavors- many of which we didn’t recognize what they even were.

The next stop was at a café which Stephan said had great coffee. We all ordered Flat Whites. It was a little surprising to find good coffee on the side of the road. The view from the back porch of the café was also phenomenal. The area reminded me of Santa Barbara, CA, but more extreme and without the snoody rich people.
We finally made it to our destination- Barichara- and Stephan drove us through the town square before taking us to where we were staying for the night- Finca San Pedro. We stopped by a roadside cafe and got some fried potatoes balls with a hard boiled egg inside. It was like a Colombian samosa. They offered spicy sauce to go with it and we loved it.

Finca means country house and the place was like a bed and breakfast out in the middle of nowhere. We were the only guests and Kathia and Jorge treated us so well. The place was so beautifully decorated that it needs to be featured in Sunset magazine. Kathia is German and got to speak with Stephan before we said goodbye to him and then Jorge, native to Medellin, showed us around.

Shortly after arrival the hosts called a Tuk Tuk to take us into town. We went to the paper workshop/ factory where local artisans still make paper the old fashioned way. We also stopped by the cemetery which has many unique sculptures carved by a local. Many of the carved tombstones were religious but some were unique to the person like a guitar or a baseball hat.

Afterwards we walked up the hill to a viewpoint and ordered a couple of cocktails from the restaurant on the top of the mountain. We watched birds soar and clouds move while the sun slowly set.

Kathia recommended a small, local, woman owned restaurant for dinner. We shared an arepa burger which basically just took an arepa and put a burger in it – it had two flat corn buns, cheese, and many vegetables. We got the same Tuk Tuk driver home and he almost made it up the steepest hill to the house but did have to concede and let us out to walk up the rest of the way.

Sunday, February 6

We woke up early and Kathia and Jorge fed us good coffee, juice, fruit, and homemade yogurt and homemade muesli with dried fruit and cocoa nibs.

We set out to hike the Camino Real- a local walk that connects to a nearby town, Guane. Our hosts advised us to leave as early as posible to avoid the heat so by 7am we were on the trail. It was a nicely maintained trail with a stone path almost the whole way.

We made it to Guanes at 8:30am. Kathia had recommended a restaurant and a place to get drinks, but it felt too early to do either. We did ask the local bodega about the local drink, Mosato, a fermented rice drink, and sampled a cup of it for about .50 cents US. Before leaving the town we also tried an arepa with egg in it that was one of the best roadside foods we’ve had.

The hike back up the hill was steep and we worked up quite a thirst. We decided to stop at the local bar to get a cold beer and try playing the local game, Bollo Criollo. Carl was pretty good at it actually and I was terrible. There was a local barfly hanging out who was kind enough to try to explain the game to us, and paid for our beers. When we tried to buy him a beer before leaving, he bought us another so then we had to go before it got too hot to walk the rest of the way.

We left and walked the rest of the way back to our Finca, getting home before noon. Surprisingly the outdoor shower was warm and there was a cool breeze. We spent the next few hours lounging in the hammocks and enjoying the view.

For dinner we went to Elvia, a fancy restaurant in town. Kathia called us a Tuk Tuk driver who looked at his phone the whole way but did stop by an Instagram famous spot, The Abyss, before taking us into town.

For dinner we tried all the weird things. One appetizer was like boiled corn cobb (just the cobb) with a creamy sauce and fried ants on the outside. It was by far the weirdest thing I’ve ever gotten at a fancy restaurant but it was tasty. We also got smoked cróquets and for our main some very herby thick bacon, like pork belly. We’ve become foodies since living in NYC and this restaurant met our standards for weirdness + deliciousness.

After we tried to find a Tuk Tuk back to the house but none were to be found. It was Sunday, and rainy, and Colombians don’t usually stay out so late (it was about 9pm when we finished dinner). We asked the restaurant and a bar nearby but it seemed the only Tuk Tuk parked in the square was driven by a man who didn’t want to take us (either too many beers or he didn’t feel like driving up some windy, dirt roads. Perhaps both). We texted our hosts but decide to try to walk it. Google maps said it would take one hour to walk. Usually a one hour walk after dinner wouldn’t phase us. And it wasn’t raining too hard when we left the town. For the record, EVERYONE said it wasn’t going to rain each day when the weather forecast predicted it, and to this point they had been right, no rain. So we hadn’t brought rain jackets and I was wearing flip flops. It seemed the second that we thought to ourselves “this isn’t bad” the rain picked up and was coming down pretty hard for a while. After about half an hour the paved road gave away to steep, dirt road. Again, normally we wouldn’t be phased but in my flip flops I kept slipping in the mud. Finally Carl saw a text from Kathia that she was coming to get us. Kathia and Jorge drove down in their Jeep Cherokee and rescued us. We examined the rest of the walk from the car and I don’t think I would’ve made it haha. We felt bad for not calling Kathia in the first place but when we got home we weren’t actually that wet and my flip flops were still intact. We slept really well after that.

Thursday, February 3

Woke up early and had breakfast at the hostel, walked out to find our driver/guide waiting for us. His name was Stephan, and he was born and raised in Germany but has been living in Colombia for last 10 years doing a variety of jobs (like showing tourists like us around). He is fluent in Spanish and English which was very useful as we headed into the countryside with new local phrases we didn’t understand (like tinto means red wine elsewhere but means black coffee in Colombia, Aromatica means tea). He talked nearly non stop about Colombian culture and history. He was so knowledgeable and -because he himself is an extranjero (foreigner) he had a great sense of what would be different and interesting for us to learn.

We left the city and made a pit stop at the Salt Cathedral before heading to our next stay. The Salt Cathedral is one of Colombia’s most beloved treasures. It was formerly a salt mine until the miners turned it into the worlds first (and only?) underground cathedral. It was a very impressive place. We both licked the wall (I licked my finger but Carl straight up just licked a wall), and indeed confirmed the whole place was made of salt. Hopefully that’s not sacreligeous. There happened to be an orchestra filming a video inside the cathedral which was beautiful to stop and listen to.

Then we stopped at a historically significant battlefield where Simon Bolivar made a victorious defeat over the royalists due to some smart thinking and a well placed bridge. Stephan was very knowledgeable about history and a good story teller.

Once we entered the next department (like a state) we pulled over to the side of the road to have some fresh arepas. I’ve had arepas before, but never like these ones. The cheese was almost like feta and the whole thing was piping hot.

Finally we arrived at Villa de Leyva, a high desert town where the people of Bogotá go to get away from it all. Villa de Leyva is known for being one of the last colonial style architecture towns with cobblestone streets built by the Spanish (you had to watch where you walked to not sprain an ankle and hold on to your tetas while driving).

Our guide drove us up to the front door of our hotel and we realized the building was on fire!!

Then found out a telenovela (Pasión de Gavilanes 2) was using our hotel for one of their scenes. They were reluctant to let us through, but they finally did and we were able to drop off our stuff so we could walk around town for a bit before the sun set. Stephan recommended a chocolatier where we got little truffles that had milk and dark chocolate nibs and caramel.

Stephan then said goodnight and Carl and I wandered around by ourselves before going to dinner. We admired the architecture and garden flowers and the chunky street dogs (well fed by the many tourist restaurants).

We decided to go to the Mercado for dinner where we had guacamole, a grilled artichoke, and wood bbq lamb. We also had Refajo which is a beer shandy with the local liquor and honey. We sat outside and had the place to ourselves because it was off season and raining the whole time. Two of the restaurant cats joined us and were very polite- only tried to eat the artichoke once.
We retired early and fell asleep to someone playing guitar and singing a sad, romantic song in Spanish outside our open window.

Friday, February 4

We met Stephan just after breakfast at our hotel. From there we walked for about an hour to a place out of town for our first adventure- to the Centro de Investigaciones de Paleontólogicas. On the way we walked past many fancy summer houses and admired their architecture and gardens.

At the paleontology center they gave us a tour in Spanish which we mostly understood. Villa de Leyva used to be under the ocean until plates collided and the land dried up to form modern Colombia, so there are many ocean creature fossils in the area.

After we drove to the Pozos Azules- green and blue ponds formed because they have sulfur, copper, and other minerals in the soil. Funny enough, as we pulled up we saw our friends- the crew from the telenovela! They were filming some scene in the dry pine tree area but we were able to walk through during their break.

Then Stephan called one of his local friends to see if we could visit. We drove to the next town up to a Taller de Tagua – a workshop where Stephan’s friend made things out of Palm nuts (Tagua). He was so kind and showed us around and showed us how he crafted things from a a raw nut. Stephan kindly bought us this example jar. We wanted to support the man and his shop so we picked out some Tagua engagement rings – each $5,000 Colombian pesos (about $1.25 US Dollars). I tried to post a video of his process but the weak WiFi gods were not having it.

Then we drove down to a local spot for some traditional lunch. We got the plate of the day which included the Longanisa de Sutamarchá- a local style super long sausage. It also had blood sausage, ribs, yucca, plantains, potatoes, and pork pieces. We also had Refrajo which is beer with lemonade or soda and honey.

Bellies full we then went to a Tejo court. Tejo is a traditional Colombian game invented by the native Muiscas. To play you throw heavy pucks at a target made of clay that has a rebar circle inside. There are also some origami triangles with gunpowder inside that sit on top of the rebar. If you get the puck in the clay, one point. If you hit the triangle and blow up the gunpowder, three points. If you get inside the rebar ring, six points. If you hit the gunpowder AND stick the puck inside the ring, nine points. We played whilst drinking copious amounts of beer, as is tradition. We didn’t keep score (which probably frustrated Carl) but we did each get a gunpowder triangle to explode and likely provided a lot of entertainment to the locals who sat and watched and laughed at our bad aim.

We went back to the town square to walk around for a bit before having dinner at Maria’s bistro. We had bone marrow tacos and pumpkin soup.

30 January
Sunday

Woke up early and grateful to find our driver waiting to take us to the airport. Our travel agency had sent us boarding passes already and getting to the gate was easy. We even had time for a cappuccino and a Pan de Bono (cheese pastry) and a meat pastry – the English translation said “meatloaf” which I laughed about because it wasn’t wrong.
It was about a 2 hour flight with loud, violently kicking children behind us the whole way. But I forgot the word for kick and am too shy/polite to tell a kid to stop anyways.

Upon landing we found our guide, Elvis, who would be with us for the next 3 days. He had ridden in on his scooter so he directed us to a taxi and had the taxi follow him. He led us to the boat docks where we awaited the public boat to take us up the Amazon. Our guide noted that the water was really low in the river, so some of the docks were perched awkwardly on the banks.

Carl went to find an atm and a snack (perhaps the best empanada and cold bottle of water of my life) while I stayed with our stuff on the dock and watched people come and go. I watched one boat strap a couple large TVs to the top and on another watched a woman climb over three wobbly canoes, wearing flip flops, all the while nursing a fresh newborn baby.
The boat was about an hour late – which didn’t bother Carl and I because it’s not like we are in any hurry. Our guide was annoyed and kept apologizing. Then other people in the crowd started speaking up. One guy said “I need to get to the bar already!” and we swear we heard a nun say “something something JESUS CHRIST”. Finally the boat arrived and we piled in. They threw our bags on top of the boat and cinched them down.

The boat ride was a little over 2 hours long but it was surprisingly nice especially considering we were packed in like sardines on a public bus. Finally our guide gave us the signal to get off. We stepped out onto a muddy bank only to get into another, smaller boat with another guide, Oleando, to go up the Amacayacu river, which borders the Amacayacu national park. During this 40 minute ride, Elvis pointed out all kinds of birds and an iguana. We saw a kingfisher, a turkey vulture, many Amazonian swifts, and three toucans! (Carl said, “that’s a threecan!” and then we left him in the jungle.)
Elvis was sooo good at spotting things that we thought he must sense the animal before he sees it. He also showed us his treat of coca powder and a tobacco paste that he said helps keep him focused.

As we approached the lodge all we could see was a wooden path/ladder leading up from the muddy dock. Climbing to the top, it looked like we might have to hike to get to the lodge but then a staff person directed us to a little, palm leaf covered hut with two bunk beds and a full sized bed with a mosquito net. I guess they use the ecolodge to host all kinds of campers, but we luckily had the bunk room all to ourselves. There was also an attached bathroom, with mesh covered windows looking out into the forest. The mirror was in an adorable wooden frame that looked like a frowning yeti. There was no hot water but cold showers actually feel good after being in humid Amazon jungle all day. There was also no power. They had a generator that they turned on from 6-830 everyday to cook dinner and gave us just enough time to charge our portable chargers.

They gave us a snack of bananas and something that was related to passion fruit -granadillas. The sun set quickly so Elvis took us on a night hike before dinner. On the night hike the first thing we saw was two tarantulas that appeared to be fighting but then we realized one was male and the other female so they were more likely mating. We also saw a scorpion, a big yellow tree frog, a leech, lots of GIANT grasshoppers, and a Fer-de-lance snake which appeared to have just eaten a rodent, lucky for us. On the way back we saw some night monkeys and bioluminescent leaves. When we turned off our flashlights to see the leaves it was like we were in pitch darkness because the tree cover was so thick. At night the rainforest was teaming with life. It seemed like anywhere we shined a flashlight we would see something alive- a big bug or worse. Grasshoppers as big as your head.

Back in our cabin there was a cockroach the length of my palm which Carl promptly murdered and threw outside as an offering to the birds. At about this point we realized that, besides living with bugs and spiders for three days, we were going to be on an involuntary detox from alcohol and social media. In the middle of the Amazon it was amazing to occasionally get one bar of service but, of course, no WiFi. For dinner they served fish, something related to a piranha, with rice and beans and plantain and a nice side of juice.
We fell asleep to the sounds of the jungle.

January 31
Monday

We woke up early and met Elvis for a breakfast of bananas, granadillas, a fried egg and fried plantains, and of course juice and coffee. There was another couple staying at the ecolodge, in the only other bunk cabin. The woman was from Ukraine and the man spoke Spanish as if he was Colombian. We talked with them a bit while eating.

Oleando showed up a little after and we all got in the boat to go to ‘the lake’. Carl and I assumed we’d be taking the boat to a different dock to then maybe a taxi to get to this lake but instead we were in the boat the whole time. We went up the Amazon to Tarapoto lake which Elvis called black water. Oleando drove the boat to the opposite end of the lake. We did some dolphin watching and saw a few gray ones.
On the way back we stopped in Puerto Nariño, located on the Amazon river, for lunch. The town seemed like paradise to me. It was a perfect little grid with well designed street drains, and palm trees lining the streets. Elvis said there were only three cars in the town- one ambulance and 2 garbage trucks. There was also a statue of a snapping turtle in the middle of the town.

At the restaurant they served us some juice that was like sour and sweet passion fruit. Carl said it was the best juice he’s ever had and he chugged about 3 glasses worth. Then they served soup, catfish, beans, rice, and plantains. We were so hot and full from chugging juice that it was hard to eat all the food.

After lunch we walked over to a viewing tower. The entrance was a giant tiger mouth like a carnival. Again, I loved this town. They could’ve just had a steel gate entrance but they chose an over-the-top giant tiger mouth. We entered and climbed to the top. It wasn’t that high up but being so full and so hot, it’s amazing we made it. From the top we had views of the whole town and the river.

We then headed back to our ecolodge where we had ‘workshop’ as Elvis called it. We sat in hammocks while Lena, one of the staff that lives and works there, showed us how to make bracelets. To my bracelet she added beads that came from seeds from a nearby plant. While we had craft time we tried to practice our Spanish with talking to Lena’s kids. We found out Lena was 32 years old (same as me) and she has a 13 year old girl named Luna, and two boys, 11 and 12 (I forgot their names). Her kids were very quiet but when Carl offered to show them pictures of the US they practically jumped out of their chairs to see.

While we waited for dinner Carl and I played cards until it grew so dark we couldn’t see. A different couple showed up that afternoon – both were French – and they were even more scared of bugs than we were. When we were getting ready to go to sleep we heard the other couple shrieking and then laughing hysterically like they saw a big bug. Then when the generator turned off and the lights went out suddenly they both screamed so loud that Carl and I were cracking up.

February 1
Tuesday

Again got up early and broke our fast before getting in the boat again. While eating breakfast Elvis heard something and ran out of the room yelling at us to follow. There was a group of Black Mantle Tamarind monkeys that were crossing the camp area near the river. We saw them just as they crossed and the alpha male took a second to give us a glare before joining his family.

To get from where we were staying to the Amazon took about 40 minutes so much of our day was sitting in the dingy and looking for birds. I started to write down all that we saw, but I couldn’t keep track. At our lodge there were two types of birds making sounds the whole time. One sounded like dripping water. The other, who woke up early and stayed up late, had a pretty three note tune that Elvis said sounded like “I sell bread” and the bird book said “que pa-so?”

Once we got to the Amazon river we went down river to Macagua and got out to walk around. We walked through the forest a bit to get to a monkey preserve. Monkey is mono in Spanish but in this area they called monkeys micos. The preserve is called Fundación Maikuchiga and they rescue monkeys who are being kept as pets or part of black market for monkey meat. One of the staff came out and told us all about the preserve and the monkeys- in Spanish- most of which we understood. My favorite was the night monkey- same type as we had see on our night walk. Carl’s favorite were the two wooly monkeys, a mother, Abril, and her son, who peed on the staff person and almost pooped on me and Carl.

We walked back into the main town to a restaurant right on the water. Again they had juice but this time it was the soup that Carl went crazy for. Best soup he ever had. After the soup they served…(can you guess?) catfish! And rice! And plantains! Also some sour tomatoes with star fruit, which was a nice surprise.

After lunch we got back in the boat and headed back to the ecolodge for a hike. Elvis said he wanted to do a three hour hike to get deep into the jungle, and we were ready. We borrowed rubber boots (to protect against snakes) from the lodge and wore pants and long sleeve shirts. I had to abandon my long sleeve because I was so hot and opted to get stung/ a rash from plants brushing my arms over fainting from heat exhaustion. We enjoyed watching/listening to Elvis call to birds and have them respond.

Amazingly, up to this point of our journey we had not been rained on at all. We heard rain at night and early morning but during the day the skies were clear and bright blue. Well, I made this remark to Carl earlier in the day and the gods must have heard because they decided to change things up. About an hour into our hike, about 4pm, we start to hear thunder. At one point, the cicadas and birds and thunder were so loud that we could barely hear each other. Elvis said “it’s going to rain”, which we knew, but appreciated his confirmation. Oleando showed us a short cut to get back faster, to try and avoid the rain. When it started it was so light that it seems like all the rain was getting caught in the canopy. Carl and I said “this isn’t that bad at all” which the gods also heard. About a minute later the rain really started. It was like someone wringing out a dishrag over our heads. For our trip, Carl and I both got new rain jackets and this was our first test of them. Quite a test also because we were already drenched in sweat before we even put them on. Elvis had a blue poncho that he held above his head and as he ran through the forest he looked like a big blue ghost. On the way out when it had been dry, we had tip toed along listening for birds and looking for snakes. Once it started raining Oleando and Elvia took off and we were basically running through the rainforest – it was fun!

I was happy to see rain in the rainforest- and all the happy frog sounds that came afterward- but on our last night a lot of our stuff was drenched. We rung things out as best as possible and hung things up, but the air was so humid that the next morning everything was exactly the same dampness.

Wednesday
February 2

Woke up at 5:15am. Elvis said the sun rose at 5 but it was still dark as night in our room. We packed up quickly and Lena served us some coffee and fruit before Oleando showed up with his boat. We got to the boat meeting spot (not a dock but some dirt that had been stepped on a lot) with plenty of time before the public boat showed up. While waiting we looked for dolphins which tend to hang out right where the Amacayacu river joins the Amazon river, which you can see because the Amazon is lighter and murkier. We saw a pair of gray dolphins and after much patient waiting finally saw a big pink dolphin! It was a crazy color and I couldn’t believe it when I finally saw one.
The public boat came and this one was a lot nicer than the one before – with cushy seats and it went faster (also going downstream this time).

Once we got back to Leticia we said heartfelt goodbyes to Elvis and got on a plane to go back to Bogotá for one night.